Bettye Mathews

Bettye Marie Mathews passed away on April 26, 2023 after battling cancer for 7 years. Her loving husband George and sister Ginny were with her in her final days.

Bettye was born on November 7, 1945 in Humboldt, Tennessee, but didn’t stick around long enough to pick up the drawl. Her father, Colonel Hugh T. Halbert, was an Air Force pilot and along with her mother and namesake, Bettye Wray Halbert, moved many times throughout her childhood. Ginny was born about a year later in California and the family moved all over the globe including Oklahoma, Guam, Japan, Minnesota, and eventually settling in New England. She had a passion for sports, was willing to try pretty much any of them, and was athletic enough to compete in them all. She excelled at academics, French and spelling being the glaring exceptions, and she received a dual degree in education and psychology from the University of Massachusetts in Amherst.

After teaching for a few years, she put her career on hold to raise her two sons, Todd and Sean, and by all accounts she did an amazing job (that degree in Psychology frequently coming in handy). She imparted unto them her passion for learning, teaching, travel, and athletics with an empathy and compassion that few could rival. She had eyes in the back of her head, dealt with every broken bone and illness (seriously Todd, a month of bronchitis?), attended every game (even wrestling – why Sean?), sweated every report card, surprised them with hooky for Return of the Jedi, imparted to them her love of games, and guided them to college success. She could not have been more proud of who they had become and they couldn’t have done it without her.

In the early 90’s she returned to teaching as a 6th grade teacher in the Narragansett School District, and how fortunate for the kids who came through her classroom. She was driven by the earnest belief that truly, no child should be left behind, and that there was a way to reach every single one of them. Her immeasurable creativity conjured fictional characters that lived in and visited her classroom and lesson plans that would “trick” the kids into learning while they were having fun. Every student knew that Charlie the ghost lived in the closet, and that he loved to receive letters from them. She had a way to make learning so interesting that it didn’t feel like work. There were few things in life that brought her more joy than the satisfaction of knowing that a particular lesson she had worked so hard to assemble had hit home with the class, and she loved telling those stories to anyone willing to listen.

In the mid 90’s she found a new listener to regale when she met George Mathews. They were married in 1997. Despite his dismay in discovering that not all teachers take summers off, they found time to do the thing they loved to do together most: travel. This included a lot of trips over the years to visit George’s family. From his brother David and sisters Marika and B. Ellen to the annual trips to North Carolina to see Carole, Scott, Kim, and everyone else in the family, she always returned with great stories of the people she got to spend time with and the places they went. They were international travelers as well and walked the beaches and caves of Belize, danced in the streets of Italy, and stopped everywhere in between. In George she found someone who matched her thirst for adventure and could manage her luggage requirements. While she may not have shared his love of fishing, she did love the rides with him on the lake. The only thing she loved to do with George more than travel, was grandparenting.

She was the master planner for the family’s annual migration to Windham, NH, and in 2001 a fourth generation was added when her niece Ashley had Aidan. Sean and his wife Tammy had their twin boys Joey and Tyler in 2003 and Todd’s son Sean Michael came along in 2005. The whole family descended upon the lakehouse for a week every summer and she worked hard to make sure that each family member had their favorite food, got to do their favorite activity, and, with the help of her sister Ginny, to plan for a celebration of whatever landmark birthday or life accomplishment had been reached that year. It was the only time when she got all the grandkids together and she relished it. If teleportation was a thing, she wouldn’t have missed a single performance or sporting event, and they all knew it. She relived them all with the boys in phone conversations so she could regale anyone willing to listen.

Listening. Her earnest listening fed into everything that endeared her to everyone. She always wanted to hear whatever story you wanted to tell. She absorbed every detail. Asked questions to make sure she understood it completely. Her empathy was unmatched. She had an acute awareness of whether the people around her were being included, either by participation or understanding, and if they weren’t she would remedy it. She reveled in all accomplishments, big or small. That’s why she was someone everyone wanted to share their stories with. Triumphs. Tragedies. She wanted to hear it all, and it was clear that the desire was genuine. For everyone. Her not being here to share our stories will likely be what we all will miss the most.

Donations may be made to the Dana-Farber Cancer Institute or Merrimack Valley Hospice House.