On a South Florida beach hundreds of miles from her home, Lori Dilley Anthony reached a turning point in her life.
He had traveled from Delaware for help for almost 35 years. addiction to opioids and other drugs. She had registered at the same treatment center as her husband, who had made the trip the previous month.
On a hot and muggy day in September, the couple and other downtown residents went to the beach, one of Anthony’s favorite places. As the sun began to set, she and her husband sat down on the sand to talk. He told her that he loved her but he wanted a divorce from her. Anthony was devastated.
She was alone in an unknown place, still fragile in her recovery. She stayed in bed for 3 days, fighting the urge to get high and refusing to rejoin the treatment program. Finally, there was a change. “It’s like God put his hands on me and said, ‘You’re worth something. Stand up now. Yo have to go ahead'”.
Anthony says that even though the experience was a low point, it was the best thing that could have happened to him. It was time for a new chapter.
Addiction experts say that one of the most important first steps in rebuilding your life after opioids is to stay sober from all drugs and alcohol.
“Some people with opioid dependence may believe that opioids are the only problem and go back to drinking alcohol socially or smoking marijuanasays Aaron Sternlicht. He has been sober from opioids since 2012 and is a co-founder of New York City-based Family Addiction Specialist. “While some may use it in moderation, it can often lead people to return to their drug of choice.”
Anthony underwent a 28-day detox and then a recovery program. She participated in the group therapy with other people dealing with drug and alcohol addiction. She has been sober since 2016.
Structure and a daily routine keep you on track when recovering from opioid addiction. Try to plan your day, from the time you get up to the time you go to bed. Find a hobby that you enjoy. Spend time with sober friends with the same interests.
When you’re busy, your mind is less likely to wander to drug use or other negative thoughts. But don’t overdo it. “Keep busy, but not to the point where it becomes a distraction from dealing with underlying issues like trauma or mental healthsays Sternlicht.
Also take care of your physical health. Opioid addiction often triggers disordered eating. This results in missed meals and poor food choices. Up to 35% of people with illicit drug dependency drugs or alcohol also have a eating disorderwhich is 11 times greater than those who do not
Regular exercise it also helps with addiction recovery. It can curb drug cravings, relieve stress, and fill your time. It also releases chemicals called endorphins from the pituitary gland to pain relief and a natural high. “When you’re feeling good, you’re less inclined to want to use drugs,” says Sternlicht.
Today, Anthony’s life looks very different from when he was in the depths of addiction. He has a house and bought a car with the money he saved from his job at a cleaning company.
When he’s not working, Anthony likes to cook and go to flea markets. He also devoted himself to painting, mainly landscapes of trees, purple blue skies, flowers, and beach scenes. She’s proud of herself, something she couldn’t say for years. “I am achieving things that I could never have done when I was addicted.”
Friends, family, sponsors, and counselors are an essential part of the addiction recovery process, providing support and listening.
Like many, Anthony faced bouts of depression and anxiety during the COVID-19 pandemic. She had little urges to get high. Instead, he called his counselor, Angela Robinson, with whom he speaks regularly.
Robinson is a licensed mental health counselor and clinical director of NorthNode Group Counseling in Dover, DE. In his work with clients, he uses cognitive behavioral therapy, a type of talk therapy. It focuses on identifying complex issues in your life, the emotions surrounding these issues, and reshaping untrue or harmful thought or behavior patterns.
Robinson says that drugs are a mask for deep-seated problems that you may be afraid to face. “It’s never about the substance. It’s always the reasons behind why you’re using them.”
Support groups such as Narcotics Anonymous and Alcoholics Anonymous offer individual therapy to those recovering from opioid addiction. They also give them the opportunity to share their struggles and successes and encourage each other to stay sober. “Having conversations within those groups can give people the understanding that someone else knows what they’re going through, but they might approach it or see it differently,” says Robinson.
Drug addiction break relationships and healing them will not happen overnight. It takes a lot of time and patience to rebuild trust. It is important to acknowledge your role in the damage to the relationship and then show that you have changed through your actions.
Unhealthy relationships can trigger a relapse. Talk to the people in your life about your recovery and how they can help you in that process. There are resources like support groups and family therapists for the loved ones of people recovering from addiction.
Anthony has surrounded himself with positive influences and is now working to rebuild broken relationships. After not speaking for 14 years, he is reunited with his sister and turns to other family and friends for emotional support.
There are also the people she calls her guardian angels, family members who support her in spirit. Photos of them hang on the wall of her house: grandparents, an aunt and uncle, and a black-and-white snapshot of her mom and dad cutting the wedding cake. She has painted a vine with colorful flowers that extends to each photo on the wall behind them. They are a reminder of where she came from and of a brighter future ahead.
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