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Managers are confused about Generation Z because giving feedback is becoming a lost art in the age of the “pampered mind.”

Harsh comments from bosses keep going viral, triggering a backlash among Generation Z against grueling working hours and pressure.

Today, many managers may be too afraid of the consequences of the direct feedback necessary for the development and growth of their employees.

“I don’t think I can give constructive, productive feedback to someone, especially in a team room with others present, because they would tell me that their psychological safety is being violated,” said a participant in a leadership workshop I recently attended.

Of course, Generation Z expects different things from their workplace. This change is positive. They want to work for a company that has a purpose and whose leaders exemplify positive values. Whether they realize it or not, they also want to grow and develop. They are fully aware that they want to make a meaningful contribution to their company’s goals and mission, but to do so, they need to learn and grow.

We may have lost sight of the old adage, “Prepare the child for the road, not the road for the child.” Today, managers must coach and develop employees who may be growing up in a world of the “pampered mind,” as Greg Lukianoff and Jonathan Haidt describe it in their book: The pampering of the American spirit. The authors identify a developing culture of “security thinking” in which young people are unprepared for any form of criticism, including uncomfortable conversations.

In this environment, it is undoubtedly more difficult to promote and develop people, but for a generous leader it is still possible.

First of all, it starts with managers. If you come from a caring environment and believe that one of your main roles as a leader is to give of yourself to help people develop, grow and reach their full potential, then it makes the most sense to start by being yourself.

Leaders need to be honest and authentic. If you really want your team to grow and develop, they will understand your intention. And you probably won’t go too far.

The gift of clear, honest and direct feedback

Recognition means taking a genuine interest in other people’s work, paying attention to details, putting your ego aside, and celebrating others’ efforts and successes. A good manager must see what their employees have accomplished and genuinely want them to build on what they do best.

However, many of us bristle at the idea of ​​celebrating “effort” simply for its own sake. It sounds like a participation trophy. But the two are not mutually exclusive. When you genuinely applaud someone for their effort, you recognize their hard work and that makes people feel seen. It builds trust and mutual respect.

Many CEOs talk about the importance of leveraging the strengths of their employees to help their company achieve its goals. As Joaquin Duato, the chairman and CEO of J&J, put it in my interview with him for my book The generous leader“The sooner you step outside of yourself, listen to others, and build a stronger connection with your teams, the sooner you will be able to unlock and leverage all the human qualities that are critical to achieving positive results.”

No one wants to be bashed or just criticized for everything they did wrong or should have done better. You need to take the time and effort to get to know a person, their strengths, their opportunities and how they can translate those strengths into ideas for improvement. Of course, it’s important to outline the areas that need improvement, but identifying strengths and training people on how to use them leads to far more effective feedback. And when all of this is combined with genuine care and interest, magic happens.

Today, many of us are afraid to give clear feedback that might hurt or make people dislike us. But this isn’t about you. If the feedback you give is clear, honest, and direct, the potential pain will be a sting at best, not a bite. Nobody likes vague feedback. Too often, feedback givers mix the positive with the areas for improvement, which can leave feedback recipients feeling good overall, rather than confident about their strengths and clear about the areas that need improvement.

Finally, the best feedback is usually given on the spot – provided all the necessary information is available and those present remain level-headed.

Feedback delivered in real time can often be much more situational (and less emotional) and the recipient can identify with what is being said because the experience is still very fresh.

Recognition of an individual is consistently cited as one of the most important behaviors people expect from a leader. A leader who notices them, listens to them, and knows when they are excelling and when they are failing and why.

In the current environment, a generous leader can still nurture and develop this generation of future leaders, not through harsh words, but through caring, empathy, and respect. If you care about these things and have made the effort to get to know the person, you have the right and opportunity to share your wisdom with others and help them grow.

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