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Parents, take a deep breath: how your kids turn out isn’t fully on you. Of course, parenting plays an important role in shaping who children become, but psychologist Yuko Munakata offers an alternative, research-backed reality that highlights how it’s just one of many factors that influence the chaotic complexity of childhood development. A rethink for anyone wondering what made them who they are today and what it means to be a good parent.
0:00 Intro
0:53 Why most parenting advice is wrong
1:50 Hurricane children vs. butterfly parents
2:53 The myth of inherited success (or struggle)
5:25 Can you predict who a child becomes?
8:19 Same event, different experience
9:59 The mystery of parenting
11:45 Stop the blame game
12:56 What you learn parenting terminally ill children
15:10 Why parenting is about staying in the moment
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Just wanna mention that Dutch parents encourage kids to leave the nest, not to be babied, but to build strong self-reliance tooooooo
Different parents would have spared me the burden of despising them.
Just look at the mirror before procreating, are you ready yet? Did you work on yourself enough?
What a wonderful lady with a message/knowledge (based on profund studies, but also on her own expierience) that creates hope, gratefulnes and brings peace and acceptance, destroyes ugly selfblame and blame from others and that inspires to go no, no matter what 🦋.
This has been one of the least actionable Ted Talks I have ever had the displeasure of watching, thank you.
whi doesn't know how a bicycle works lol, like 90% of men would easily lol
South Koreans win a lot of Olympic medals in Tae Kwon Do. Japanese win a lot of Olympic Judo medals.
So, could a complete lack of education and training suddenly make an inventive society with genius discoveries?
Train up a child the way you would like it to go and when it's grown it will not depart from it. [Proverbs]
Well, I'm bawling my eyes out. So touching
This is a wonderful message for already good parents. Not a general message for all parents. Just my two cents.
Parents interfere with their Childrens freewill to make their own choices just because they don't like what makes them happy.
Plain wrong.
Dumbest conclusions ever. The study would only work on twins and even then parents are biased.
Parents change over the years so it is not the same parent raising another kid. I mean, come on, let those scientists out of their basements 😂
I think parents can affect their children in ways that are difficult for scientific experiments to measure. E.g. how the child feels about intimate relationships, the child's attitude towards getting married and starting a family, or whether the child is drawing strength from her childhood to tackle everyday adversities or is the child drawing strength from everyday life to mend childhood scars.
New parents should hug their children more often in my view.
At the end what she wants to say without faithful words is that our children’s outcome ultimately depends on God and we have to love them and give Him the trust that He shapes them to their perfection if we allow! In you I trust my GOD my LORD!🙏🏽🥰
In current digital era there r difficulties in parenting
Narcissistic parenting styles are the cause of fatalist suicide.
– it makes me wonder about which studies were used and how the children and parents were followed.
Also would crappy neglectful parents even be a part of studies used for this research? If my parents were asked to be part of a study they would not have done so willingly. Parents are the number one “conditioners” in early childhood I had assumed. It makes me think of Little Albert. That poor child was conditioned to be terrified of white things.
Also the problem of how two kids in the same family can experience two entirely different parenting experiences.
This talk opened up so many questions for me.
Most parents want to do right by their children but I would assume that this talk could give parents license to treat their children with less regard?
I get we have no control over what our little humans will turn out like given the best of circumstances and what effects will be carried with them and what will not.
The discovery that trauma is carried down genetically how would that work with this theory?
Interesting talk
as a father of a 2 year old and very sassy daughter, i went through a few parenting styles , and this are my reflections.
always be open to learn and to be taught , not just by others, but even by your child.
always be ready to shift and constantly adjust your parenting style according to your childs personality
remember you will make mistakes , try to forgive yourself and become better.
Can you imagine watching this from Palestine 🇵🇸
Are you saying child abuse doesn't affect how a child turns out? Are you saying that narcissism is something that people are born with? What about cluster b personality disorders?
Her presentation sounds so superficial and robotic. I know she's reading a teleprompter but she's far from a natural presenter.
Okay So this is a nature vs nurture debate, and your bottom line is nurture doesn't matter. Got it. If you think that years and years of being exposed to the two most significant figures in your life has no influence on your character, responses and knee jerk reactions, you have missed the bottom line of parenting. As adults, yes, we have the responsibility to better ourselves for ourselves, because this isn't dependent on our parents anymore, but those behaviors that needs to be unlearned they are due to how we were raised not just our nature.
This is a beautiful song to parenthood – thank you
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